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Forums - The lounge
Subject: uncommon wisdom
Viewing all 3 messages - View by pages of 10: 1
Original Message 1/3 05-May-03 @ 10:16 AM - uncommon wisdom
Zazza
Posts: 1502
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Those who believe in psychokinesis raise my hand.
Early bird gets the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese.
Quantum Mechanics: The dreams stuff is made of
I almost had a psychic girlfriend but she left me before we met
OK, so what's the speed of dark?
How do you tell when you run out of invisible ink?
If everything seems to be going well, you have obviously overlooked
something.
Support bacteria - they're the only culture some people have
Depression is merely anger without enthusiasm
When everything's coming your way, you're in the wrong lane.
Ambition is a poor excuse for not having enough sense to be lazy.
Hard work pays off in the future. Laziness pays off now.
The only substitute for good manners is fast reflexes.
Everyone has a photographic memory. Some don't have film.
Drink 'til she's cute, but stop before the wedding
Shin: a device for finding furniture in the dark.
Most people quit looking for work as soon as they find a job.
I intend to live forever - so far, so good
Join the Army, meet interesting people, kill them.
Energiser Bunny arrested, charged with battery.
If Barbie is so popular, why do you have to buy her friends?
Eagles may soar, but weasels don't get sucked into jet engines
I drive way too fast to worry about cholesterol
Mental backup in progress - Do Not Disturb!
Televangelists: The Pro Wrestlers of religion.
Give a man a free hand and he'll run it all over you.
If I worked as much as others, I would do as little as they.
Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder ...
24 hours in a day ... 24 beers in a case ... coincidence?
When I'm not in my right mind, my left mind gets pretty crowded.
Boycott shampoo! Demand real poo!
If you choke a smurf, what colour does it turn?
Who is General Failure and why is he reading my hard disk?
What happens if you get scared half to death twice?
I poured Spot remover on my dog. Now he's gone.
I used to have an open mind but my brains kept falling out.
I couldn't repair your brakes, so I made your horn louder.
Laughing stock: cattle with a sense of humour.
Why do psychics have to ask you for your name?
For Sale: Parachute. Only used once, never opened, small stain.
Corduroy pillows: They're making headlines!
I tried sniffing Coke once, but the ice cubes got stuck in my nose.
If at first you don't succeed, destroy all evidence that you tried.
A conclusion is the place where you got tired of thinking.
Experience is something you don't get until just after you need it.
For every action, there is an equal and opposite criticism.
He who hesitates is probably right.
Never do card tricks for the group you play poker with.
No one is listening until you make a mistake.
The hardness of the butter is proportional to the softness of the bread.
To steal ideas from one person is plagiarism; to steal from many is
research.
To succeed in politics, it is often necessary to rise above your
principles.
Two wrongs are only the beginning.
You never really learn to swear until you learn to drive.
The problem with the gene pool is that there is no lifeguard.
Monday is an awful way to spend 1/7th of your life.
The sooner you fall behind, the more time you'll have to catch up.
A clear conscience is usually the sign of a bad memory.
If you must choose between two evils, pick the one you've never tried before.
Change is inevitable....except from vending machines.
Don't sweat petty things....or pet sweaty things.
A fool and his money are soon partying.
If you think nobody cares about you, try missing a couple of payments.
Love may be blind, but marriage is a real eye-opener.
Drugs may lead to nowhere, but at least it's the scenic route.
Everybody repeat after me....."We are all individuals."
I'd kill for a Nobel Peace Prize.
Death to all fanatics!
'Guests who kill talk show hosts' - On the last Geraldo.
Borrow money from pessimists-they don't expect it back.
Beware of geeks bearing gifts.
Half the people you know are below average.
99 percent of lawyers give the rest a bad name.
Early bird gets the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese.
Quantum Mechanics: The dreams stuff is made of
I almost had a psychic girlfriend but she left me before we met
OK, so what's the speed of dark?
How do you tell when you run out of invisible ink?
If everything seems to be going well, you have obviously overlooked
something.
Support bacteria - they're the only culture some people have
Depression is merely anger without enthusiasm
When everything's coming your way, you're in the wrong lane.
Ambition is a poor excuse for not having enough sense to be lazy.
Hard work pays off in the future. Laziness pays off now.
The only substitute for good manners is fast reflexes.
Everyone has a photographic memory. Some don't have film.
Drink 'til she's cute, but stop before the wedding
Shin: a device for finding furniture in the dark.
Most people quit looking for work as soon as they find a job.
I intend to live forever - so far, so good
Join the Army, meet interesting people, kill them.
Energiser Bunny arrested, charged with battery.
If Barbie is so popular, why do you have to buy her friends?
Eagles may soar, but weasels don't get sucked into jet engines
I drive way too fast to worry about cholesterol
Mental backup in progress - Do Not Disturb!
Televangelists: The Pro Wrestlers of religion.
Give a man a free hand and he'll run it all over you.
If I worked as much as others, I would do as little as they.
Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder ...
24 hours in a day ... 24 beers in a case ... coincidence?
When I'm not in my right mind, my left mind gets pretty crowded.
Boycott shampoo! Demand real poo!
If you choke a smurf, what colour does it turn?
Who is General Failure and why is he reading my hard disk?
What happens if you get scared half to death twice?
I poured Spot remover on my dog. Now he's gone.
I used to have an open mind but my brains kept falling out.
I couldn't repair your brakes, so I made your horn louder.
Laughing stock: cattle with a sense of humour.
Why do psychics have to ask you for your name?
For Sale: Parachute. Only used once, never opened, small stain.
Corduroy pillows: They're making headlines!
I tried sniffing Coke once, but the ice cubes got stuck in my nose.
If at first you don't succeed, destroy all evidence that you tried.
A conclusion is the place where you got tired of thinking.
Experience is something you don't get until just after you need it.
For every action, there is an equal and opposite criticism.
He who hesitates is probably right.
Never do card tricks for the group you play poker with.
No one is listening until you make a mistake.
The hardness of the butter is proportional to the softness of the bread.
To steal ideas from one person is plagiarism; to steal from many is
research.
To succeed in politics, it is often necessary to rise above your
principles.
Two wrongs are only the beginning.
You never really learn to swear until you learn to drive.
The problem with the gene pool is that there is no lifeguard.
Monday is an awful way to spend 1/7th of your life.
The sooner you fall behind, the more time you'll have to catch up.
A clear conscience is usually the sign of a bad memory.
If you must choose between two evils, pick the one you've never tried before.
Change is inevitable....except from vending machines.
Don't sweat petty things....or pet sweaty things.
A fool and his money are soon partying.
If you think nobody cares about you, try missing a couple of payments.
Love may be blind, but marriage is a real eye-opener.
Drugs may lead to nowhere, but at least it's the scenic route.
Everybody repeat after me....."We are all individuals."
I'd kill for a Nobel Peace Prize.
Death to all fanatics!
'Guests who kill talk show hosts' - On the last Geraldo.
Borrow money from pessimists-they don't expect it back.
Beware of geeks bearing gifts.
Half the people you know are below average.
99 percent of lawyers give the rest a bad name.
Message 2/3 05-May-03 @ 09:21 PM - RE: uncommon wisdom
have you found time to listen to the remix yet?
24 hours in a day......
24 hours in a day......
Message 3/3 08-May-03 @ 04:45 AM - RE: uncommon wisdom
"Quantum Mechanics: The dreams stuff is made of"
by far my fav. that's actual wisdom there.
by far my fav. that's actual wisdom there.
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