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Forums - The lounge
Subject: damn
Viewing all 48 messages - View by pages of 10: 1 2 3 4 5
Original Message 1/48 09-Apr-10 @ 05:11 AM - damn
but damn. so much talent has come through here. you know the chill factor that sends chills up
your spine. dancetech posters have posted so many of those kind of tracks it's unbelievable
really. kudos to you bunch of miscreant bastards
Message 2/48 09-Apr-10 @ 10:29 AM - RE: damn
i dont get it. i've tested the registration procedure and then the add-track/mix procedure many times. and it all seems to work fine.
i just dont get it.
___________________________________
I had an idea for a script once. It's basically Jaws except when the guys in the boat are going after Jaws, they look around and there's an even bigger Jaws. The guys have to team up with Jaws to get Bigger Jaws.... I call it... Big Jaws!!!
Message 3/48 09-Apr-10 @ 11:23 AM - RE: damn
I got a job offer yesterday - woo hoo, i'm about to join the rat-race after 20 years of muso skintness.
when's the prs payment this month k? I'm brassic!
Message 4/48 09-Apr-10 @ 06:37 PM - RE: damn
___________________________________
I had an idea for a script once. It's basically Jaws except when the guys in the boat are going after Jaws, they look around and there's an even bigger Jaws. The guys have to team up with Jaws to get Bigger Jaws.... I call it... Big Jaws!!!
Message 5/48 12-Apr-10 @ 01:57 AM - RE: damn
NastyM
Posts: 294
Link?: No link
File?: No file
k wrote:
many people are joining every day, but only about 1% add music.
I find that absolutely shocking to believe - 1%.
when i first signed up, seems like about a year ago, you had quite a healthy turnover of new "material" and a busy lounge area.
is the site promoted in any way?
i originally discovered you through "Sound on Sound"s forum in a link for free web space along with a couple of others ...... not quite sure why i picked this one but am glad i did.... think it may have been the fact the others seemed a little too business like for sorts such as i.
Message 6/48 13-Apr-10 @ 02:38 AM - RE: damn
to it for a couple of years. it was a very informative mag i thought.
Message 7/48 13-Apr-10 @ 11:33 AM - RE: damn
the red5 screen post has had 1000+ views and the views are as high as many busy forums such as sos
same with signups, we get plenty every day
but participation is not there - it's weird - it's like a sort of mass version of "i dont want to be first to put a toe in the water"
the only thing i can think that might kick start it again is to get some sponsorship and have monthly contests with equipment prizes, like maybe a deejay mix competition monthly with decks or mixers etc as prizes from someone like vestax or whoever - also something like a monthly track contest with again, prizes of s/w or whatever
aint got the budget to pay for prizes tho
___________________________________
I had an idea for a script once. It's basically Jaws except when the guys in the boat are going after Jaws, they look around and there's an even bigger Jaws. The guys have to team up with Jaws to get Bigger Jaws.... I call it... Big Jaws!!!
Message 8/48 13-Apr-10 @ 01:18 PM - RE: damn
NastyM
Posts: 294
Link?: No link
File?: No file
Does a competition necessarily have to offer prizes ... or coud it be for the hell of it ?
I love to go out cycling, and always set myself new goals (timewise) and often if another cyclist comes in view ill do my best to run the bastard off the hill - its just personal pride and a sense of achievement I lust after (entering a serious contest / competition would probably deflate my sails)
I think what i am trying to say is lets just have a little fun, offer up a comp with little more to offer than the satisfaction of the victor gaining respect from his peers.
the only thing would be to select impartial judges rather than rely on votes which could easily be manipulated.
What you think Mr K?
Message 9/48 13-Apr-10 @ 01:26 PM - RE: damn
NastyM
Posts: 294
Link?: No link
File?: No file
the bit below was an extract from a previous posting earlier last year about a track wich i since deleted:
"the track originated (believe it or not) from a drum sample taken from "desire" by Talk Talk
, - however its barely recognisable any more!
- also had to find my way round my software a little better (lifting sample and converting to an acidized loop) quite a rapid learning curve to achieve in time.
Scotty Andrews sure has got cracking titties though (completely natural) !!!
- identify a sample and utilise"
these were my sentiments at the time and they still hold good for me - go on Kaptain chuck some gloves / gauntlets into the ether, its all good fun!!
Message 10/48 13-Apr-10 @ 04:23 PM - RE: damn
___________________________________
I had an idea for a script once. It's basically Jaws except when the guys in the boat are going after Jaws, they look around and there's an even bigger Jaws. The guys have to team up with Jaws to get Bigger Jaws.... I call it... Big Jaws!!!
Message 11/48 13-Apr-10 @ 05:41 PM - RE: damn
NastyM
Posts: 294
Link?: No link
File?: No file
afterall it only requires an invitation on a notice board and say a little time by you and the team to review the tracks (what the hell offer it up to user votes as well or do the full slime-on cowheel trick and make people pay to vote! - if you want to offer a little incentive chuck in a badge and the track of the month slot!
Message 12/48 14-Apr-10 @ 12:49 AM - RE: damn
NastyM wrote:
just a thought, wouldnt cost anything, and maybe it may
generate a little more interest within the site (not necessary new users,) after all anyone bobbing in
for a good old nose is more likely to join, or return visit if there is a little going on, what says yow??
afterall it only requires an invitation on a notice board and say a little time by you and the team to
review the tracks (what the hell offer it up to user votes as well or do the full slime-on cowheel trick
and make people pay to vote! - if you want to offer a little incentive chuck in a badge and the track of
the month slot!
i think that's a good idea although not the pay to vote thing. i can't see people uploading credit card
info to vote. and i'm thinking DT is probably more productive and lucrative now but i still loved it when
more people were in the forum. all the slaggit stuff flinging around was stimulating.
Message 13/48 14-Apr-10 @ 02:46 PM - RE: damn
NastyM
Posts: 294
Link?: No link
File?: No file
Message 14/48 15-Apr-10 @ 12:51 AM - RE: damn
peoples' tracks and the comments didn't seem to go through. it was while the site was mid revamp.
Message 15/48 16-Apr-10 @ 02:21 PM - RE: damn
k wrote:
they spent it all on lawyers & bribing politicians... sorry
bastids!
I got the prs cash yesterday - £75 paid the phone bill and some beers.
I also got another job offer today - which i've taken
- 20 years of scrounging around for a musical pittance and then 4 years of a university course and i get 2 job offers in a week.If i ever post on here complaining about work, shoot me. ;)
... thinking about it don't shoot me, just a mild snarky comment will do.
///
i've no idea how to get forums going again - you might need to think about whether forums are the best thing for a site like this
have a look at stackoverflow.com
and a related music oriented site keyminor.com
Message 16/48 17-Apr-10 @ 02:28 AM Edit: 17-Apr-10 | 03:21 AM - RE: damn
NastyM
Posts: 294
Link?: No link
File?: No file
ps 20 years o workin 1 nasty RTA maybe no trad work again , maybe just maybe the next 20 doin sound n scrounge
im soooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo pissed off righty now
sorry to all who have been brutalized
narked M
Message 17/48 17-Apr-10 @ 02:44 PM - RE: damn
___________________________________
I had an idea for a script once. It's basically Jaws except when the guys in the boat are going after Jaws, they look around and there's an even bigger Jaws. The guys have to team up with Jaws to get Bigger Jaws.... I call it... Big Jaws!!!
Message 18/48 17-Apr-10 @ 10:48 PM - RE: damn
Message 19/48 19-Apr-10 @ 10:33 AM - RE: damn
NastyM
Posts: 294
Link?: No link
File?: No file
Message 20/48 20-Apr-10 @ 12:24 AM - RE: damn
or sound ideas and sound as in what our ears put up with all day long. just think of the money the
mag would have saved on ink by omitting the word *on* over time and the printing of millions of
mags. and don't get me wrong, it's a great mag but what does 'sound on sound' mean? is the owner
of the mag "Samuel Sound" or something? now the acronym SOS makes sense. heaven knows my
tracks needed more SOS than one magazine could possibly offer but I doubt they named their mag
so they'd have a cool acronym. and since you've all asked whats up with the name "future music" i'll
shed some light. no fucking clue. you could write a renaissance track for crumhorn, psaltery,
recorder, percussion...oh and if you ever wanted to know where drummer jokes got their start....
click
and let's not forget *bladderpipe* (a real pisser playing that), and if you haven't uploaded the track yet
to dancetech it qualifies as future music and yet i never saw an ad for any of that kit in the mag.
now that you think i've totally changed the present topic here's where i'm going with all of this. my
forum posts have always been far more entertaining than my tracks. more people posted in the
forum when i was posting tracks. since i stopped posting tracks more people are listening to the
track list. coincidence? i think not. if i start posting tracks again i guarantee listenership will drop and
people will be back in the forum.
Message 21/48 20-Apr-10 @ 07:02 PM - RE: damn
figure that one out
a baker made all manner of bread in his bakery but for some reason couldn't move the French bread
off the shelf so he made fewer and fewer of the loaves until he found himself only making one loaf of
French bread a day and he couldn't even sell that. one morning he came up with an idea. he mixed
all the eggs he had into the loaf of French bread, thinking that it would be richer and more moist.
subsequently he had no eggs for the other breads. the plan backfired. not only did no one buy the loaf
of French bread that day but everyone complained about the other breads and he went out of
business. the moral of the story? don't put all your eggs in one baguette.
Message 22/48 21-Apr-10 @ 06:04 PM - RE: damn
Message 23/48 21-Apr-10 @ 07:59 PM - RE: damn
NastyM
Posts: 294
Link?: No link
File?: No file
Musineer Productions wrote:
Dough!
Message 24/48 22-Apr-10 @ 01:39 AM - RE: damn
Musineer Productions wrote:
Oh dear, and like a glutten for punishment I
read to the end. Dough!
lol touche!
Message 25/48 23-Apr-10 @ 12:45 PM - RE: damn
sitar wrote:
did you notice my clicky on the linky thing on my above post works? only took me about 11 years to
figure that one out
a baker made all manner of bread in his bakery but for some reason couldnt move the French bread
off the shelf so he made fewer and fewer of the loaves until he found himself only making one loaf of
French bread a day and he couldnt even sell that. one morning he came up with an idea. he mixed
all the eggs he had into the loaf of French bread, thinking that it would be richer and more moist.
subsequently he had no eggs for the other breads. the plan backfired. not only did no one buy the loaf
of French bread that day but everyone complained about the other breads and he went out of
business. the moral of the story? dont put all your eggs in one baguette.
*slump*
___________________________________
I had an idea for a script once. It's basically Jaws except when the guys in the boat are going after Jaws, they look around and there's an even bigger Jaws. The guys have to team up with Jaws to get Bigger Jaws.... I call it... Big Jaws!!!
Message 26/48 23-Apr-10 @ 08:09 PM Edit: 23-Apr-10 | 08:11 PM - RE: damn
k wrote:
*slump*
i thought it was pretty good considering i must've made it up in my sleep because it was the first
thing in my head when i woke up.
Message 27/48 26-Apr-10 @ 07:42 AM - RE: damn
A lady drove to a supermarket and did her weekly shopping. Returning to her car she stuffed the bags on the back seats, sat in the driver's seat, scoffed a snack and prepared to drive off. Suddenly there was a loud bang. She felt the impact on the back of her head. Feeling with her hand, she tentatively touched where the impact had been. The wet, sticky, viscous substance that she found left her in no doubt that the back of her skull had been blown off -- she could even feel the lumpy texture of her brain, with just a bit of give. In horror, she sat perfectly still waiting for someone to notice her, thinking that if she didn't move the surgeons might be able to save her life. People parked next to her, shopped, returned and drove off. She couldn't turn her head in case her brain fell out. No one looked in to her car. When the supermarket had closed a worker noticed her car, alone in the car park. He walked over and, seeing the lady's tearful face, asked if all was okay. The woman explained her predicament through gritted teeth. The worker reached around her head and, without warning, sank his fingers into the soft gooey texture and ripped a large piece away in his fist. She shrieked then, just before fainting, laughed.
Turns out she'd bought one of those bake-your-own bread cartons that contain the ready-to-go dough. Because of the heat the canister had exploded, splattering the back of her head with a glob of dough that she'd thought was the old grey.
Message 28/48 28-Apr-10 @ 01:58 AM - RE: damn
m mobile beeped - text arrived from a mate - she said not to tell anyone we knew but she'd been arrested
i was like ..what!!! omg!!
the text went on saying that they had taken her to the station and the urine test was positive, but she'd done a silly thing and tried to leg it with the sample
"now they are charging me with taking the piss"
lol
bastard!!! i fell for it till the last line!
___________________________________
I had an idea for a script once. It's basically Jaws except when the guys in the boat are going after Jaws, they look around and there's an even bigger Jaws. The guys have to team up with Jaws to get Bigger Jaws.... I call it... Big Jaws!!!
Message 30/48 29-Apr-10 @ 05:59 PM - RE: damn
i had a little accident on my pushbike on tuesday just by here:
View Larger Map
some idiot opened the passenger door in traffic and i rode straight into it at around 15mph, went flying, landed on the tarmac. There was a cop van two cars in front, when i opened my eyes i saw this copper and the girl who opened the door looking down at me asking if i could move
Message 31/48 29-Apr-10 @ 10:33 PM - RE: damn
Bedwyr wrote:
when i opened my eyes i saw this copper and the girl who
opened the door looking down at me asking if i could move
You should have answered, "nah. i like the neighborhood i live in now".
k, it reminds of when the kids i grew up with played sports every day. two of us would be team
captains. the captains would the odd or evens finger thing and whoever won would have the first pick
for his team. one of the kids named nathan wasn't the best of players but he was always chosen first
because it was fun to say yer in nate.
Message 32/48 30-Apr-10 @ 01:25 PM - RE: damn
NastyM
Posts: 294
Link?: No link
File?: No file
Mr Beds (aka tarmac muncher) I trust you didnt suffer any real harm - ive had a few similar incidents usually cars cutting across my path completely misjudging my speed temporarily either turning me into some caped crusader flying through the air or more often not just presenting me with the problem of rapid deceleration.
As a result i try to avoid roads as much as possible and stick to the hills prefering mountain biking at least any accidents will be my sole responsibility - ive just realized you might actually not be interested in cycling at all and just use the back to travel to work. sorry for the winge i`ll get my coat.
Martyn
Message 33/48 30-Apr-10 @ 02:04 PM - RE: damn
No harm really, some bruises on my leg and my shoulder is still quite sore (not really sure what happened, too quick) I definitely hit the car door somehow but the bike was generally ok (front wheel needs tightening up, maybe a new one), gears knackered, need to re-adjust. I was nowhere near the bike when I landed though.
First thing I thought was thank fk I had my helmet on, then realised I didn't, then I started hurting. Main thing is I didn't whack my head on anything.
Not really a cyclist, been using it mainly to get to the train station, although me and the wife just had a weekend in west Wales cycling around, lurvely. Will probably do quite a bit over the summer, no mountains just roads and easy tracks.
Message 34/48 30-Apr-10 @ 11:36 PM - RE: damn
motorcycle accident, the queens-midtown tunnel. my wife was on the back. there is a toll booth at
the end of the long island expressway just before the entrance to the tunnel. just when i got to the toll
booth the police held everyone to let a motorcade through, probably a politician or u.n. person. the
motorcade when through and after a moment they let everyone else through. I was the first into the
tunnel and got up to 50mph. the speed limit is 45. it was a very hot 4th of july day. i came to a curve
in the tunnel forgetting it is cobblestone and i guess because of the heat of the day the cobblestone
was slick. the bike slid out from underneath my wife and i so smoothly that i didn't realize we were
having an accident until i saw my wife slide past me and saw the bike sliding in a slow spin ahead of
me. i didn't feel i was injured so i jumped up. my wife who slid further along got up and starting
coming toward me but i yelled at her to stay back. i then started heading back around the curve
waving my arms, hoping i could stop cars coming around the corner from reaching my wife and still
jump out of the way of the two lane traffic. to my surprise two cars came around the corner very
slowly and stopped upon seeing me. i turned around to head back toward my wife and there was
already an ambulance and another emergency vehicle coming toward us from the other side of the
tunnel. turned out they have cameras and people who watch the tunnel. i picked up my bike, a bmw
k75s and it started right up. the next day i couldn't bend one of my knees but after a few days that
healed up.
Message 35/48 01-May-10 @ 01:49 AM Edit: 01-May-10 | 02:02 AM - RE: damn
But it just goes to show should have bought a jap bike even the wife can overtake you on her arse when your on a BMW.
www.youtube.com/watch?v=9a6zq_BZ_JU
By the fuck Sitar im only replying to your message and ive already become inept at attaching files - click the bloody link button will you!
I know its old hat - but if you dont find this funny you should contact dignitas and get your remains deposited in some lake in Zurich!
Message 36/48 01-May-10 @ 02:07 AM Edit: 01-May-10 | 02:12 AM - RE: damn
http://www.photonewsonline.net/
The head of the Swiss suicide euthanasia company Dignitas is facing jail after the discovery of more than 50 urns containing human remains dumped in Lake Zurich. Rumours first surfaced in 2008 when it was reported that the bodies of British and other suicide tourists were being dumped in Lake Geneva.Now police divers have discovered dozens of urns abandoned on the bottom of the lake, all bearing the logo from the cremation authorities where Dignitas is based.Swiss courts have the power to jail organisers of unauthorised lake burials for three years and fine them 30,000 GBP per case. The lake is a popular bathing resort and also the source of local Drinking water. Daniel Scheidegger of the local council said: "Pouring the ashes into the water is a very bad idea. It floats on the surface and gets carried to the bank. Eventually, mortal remains end up in the lake’s mud at the bank."Critics say Dignitas simply dumped the remains to avoid paying for services and funerals.The urns were discovered when police called in divers to help them look for the sun cover that had blown off a police boat and sunk in the lake. Official diver Roman Ruetz said: "We stopped counting at 50 urns. They’re all lying on a heap." Together with colleague Michi Wunderli, 23, they have so far bought 13 of the containers to the surface.Local mayor Max Baumgartner, 48, said: "I am furious. In particular the large number of urns left me really shocked. It looks like they have been systematically dumping them here. We are of course waiting for the official police report however before doing anything else."
Im sure i used to be able to just add links to the page.
If not its all Sitars fault and his contageous technovirus he appears to be able to pass through my screen - possibly some sort of VDyou shit
BTW only messing M
Message 37/48 01-May-10 @ 05:45 AM - RE: damn
lol at the hitler vid but i'll tell you something. i bought the k75, a 750 inline 3 cylinder bike, reluctantly
because the bike i traded in for it was a honda v65 saber, an 1100 bike that in its day was the fastest
production bike in the world with a claim of going from 0 to 60 in 2.31 seconds. i hit around 35 before
shifting to 2nd gear so i imagine that exceleration was possible on a track with a light enough person.
yet the honda was a bit nerve racking because when i go it to 60 or so the front end was a bit
unstable. the first time i took the bmw to the end of the long island expressway where there was very
little traffic i remember thinking i was doing 60. i looked at the speedometer and was surprised i was
doing almost 90. i slowed down to 60 but a few minutes later was back up at 90. i had a radar
detector on the bike so i wasn't too worried but i was amazed at how smooth the bike was. it was
like i traded in a tv with rabbit ears for an hd tv. the thing had bosch technology and formula 1 fuel
injection and i rode that bike for 7 or 8 hours at a time on several occasions without suffering any
body fatigue. changed the oil regularly and never had a problem with it. little or no vibration riding it
and my wife said it was the most comfortable to ride on the back of all the bikes i owned. loved that
thing and although it was a sport bike but not exactly a crotch rocket i know ninja riders had to stop
after a couple of hours because their wrists couldn't take it any longer.
Message 38/48 01-May-10 @ 10:24 AM - RE: damn
NastyM
Posts: 294
Link?: No link
File?: No file
Message 39/48 04-May-10 @ 07:53 AM - RE: damn
I had a VF 750 once with a front that went unstable as you slowed to 60 ish. Had far to many wobbly moments approaching central London. Had to accelerate to cure the wobble. Blart.
Also had a CBX 550 that I loved. Despatched it for years and rode it all round Europe. Champion bike.
When I was learning, first week it was, a car cut across two lanes and I hit its side. An MZ 125 it was -- put the front wheel where the engine ought to have been and dented the tank wi' me knackers. But I also had the flying through the air moment. My helmet came off (that was the moment I learnt to tie them securely) and one of my shoes (buy boots I thought). I cleared the fast lane and landed in the oncoming fast lane. Few hours in hospital and I was okay. Night after the first XTC party, not that that had anything to do with it I'm sure.
Message 40/48 04-May-10 @ 11:53 PM - RE: damn
have to by law wear a helmet. I bought a set of BMW special edition racing leathers. the back of the
jacket zips to the back the pants in those leather suits. this suit was all read and had lots of pads and
a small zipper pocket and the sleeves, for keys and what not i suppose. here's an interesting little
thing. in new york state there are 2 basic ratings for helms, department of transportation and snell
which is a higher rating. a helmet must past at least the dot rating to be sold legally in the stater.
BMW helms were only passed the dot because there are buttons on either side of the jaw piece you
can press and then the jaw piece and visor can be pushed up and over the top of the helmet, kind of
like when you lift your sunglasses and rest them on the top of your head. the thing is, that is a brilliant
safety feature. the reason for it is that one of the first concerns about a person in a motorcycle is the
possibility of a spinal injury in the neck so with a jaw piece that can be moved out of the way it is
possible to administer oral resuscitation without having to remove the helmet. there was a time when
i thought going down the road on a harley chopper wearing jeans, an open shirt, sunglasses and no
helmet looked cool but i finally entered puberty and that ended the cool factor of that look. actually the
first time loved the crotch rocket full leathers full helmet look was one night at lake geneva in
switzerland when a small army of bikers roared in to hangout.
Message 41/48 12-May-10 @ 01:18 PM - RE: damn
I went cycling again on the weekend but ended up doing more damage to my shoulder I think, it's been aching quite a bit the last few days, the painkillers aren't touching it and I've had trouble sleeping properly. Not only have we now got a bastard Tory government backed up by the idiot Liberal Democrat losers but last night this happened:
I woke up to the smell of smoke and sound of alarms at 1:30 am ... some prick tried to kill us all by setting fire to a guys door in the communal hallway on the floor below us. I live in a block of flats on the 3rd floor and there's no fire escape, fire extinguishers or sprinklers.
Message 42/48 12-May-10 @ 02:14 PM - RE: damn
NastyM
Posts: 294
Link?: No link
File?: No file
I`m sure i once read that one way to stop a forest fire spreading is to start controlled fires along the path of the main fire thus destroying any potentially flamable material / fuel and thus halting the fires progress.
If was you living on the third floor of flats without fire escapes or sprinklers i would suggest keeping a small supply of tinder and kindling in the stairwell, then in the event of a fire on a lower floor you can start a controlled fire in the stairwell thus halting the progress of the fire from below.
How the hell I think these brainbox ideas up i`ll never know - I suppose you've either got it or not.
Message 43/48 14-May-10 @ 01:15 PM - RE: damn
___________________________________
I had an idea for a script once. It's basically Jaws except when the guys in the boat are going after Jaws, they look around and there's an even bigger Jaws. The guys have to team up with Jaws to get Bigger Jaws.... I call it... Big Jaws!!!
Message 44/48 14-May-10 @ 08:59 PM - RE: damn
door.
Message 45/48 21-May-10 @ 04:57 PM - RE: damn
'Ladies and Gentlemen, this is your Captain. Welcome to Flight 293, non-stop from London
Heathrow to Toronto . The weather ahead is good, so we should have a smooth uneventful flight. So
sit back,relax and..... OH, MY GOD !'
Silence followed! . Some moments later the captain came back on the intercom. 'Ladies and
gentlemen, I'm sorry if I scared you While I was talking to you, a flight attendant accidentally spilled a
cup of hot coffee in my lap. You should see the front of my pants!'
One Irish passenger yelled... 'For fuck's sake ... you should see the back of mine!!!'
Message 46/48 21-May-10 @ 07:47 PM - RE: damn
sitar wrote:
Shortly after a British Airways flight had reached its cruising altitude, the captain announced:
Ladies and Gentlemen, this is your Captain. Welcome to Flight 293, non-stop from London
Heathrow to Toronto . The weather ahead is good, so we should have a smooth uneventful flight. So
sit back,relax and..... OH, MY GOD !
Silence followed! . Some moments later the captain came back on the intercom. Ladies and
gentlemen, Im sorry if I scared you While I was talking to you, a flight attendant accidentally spilled a
cup of hot coffee in my lap. You should see the front of my pants!
One Irish passenger yelled... For fucks sake ... you should see the back of mine!!!
ha ha ha!!
___________________________________
I had an idea for a script once. It's basically Jaws except when the guys in the boat are going after Jaws, they look around and there's an even bigger Jaws. The guys have to team up with Jaws to get Bigger Jaws.... I call it... Big Jaws!!!
Message 47/48 25-May-10 @ 11:47 PM Edit: 26-May-10 | 01:44 AM - RE: damn
supposedly noah's grandfather. ethiopian christians still include the chapter in their bible. even
so there is a part that of the book of enoch that has been totally excluded and is nowhere to be
found.
one day enoch was working in his home when he heard a voice calling him,
"enoch........enoch"
enoch looked around and seeing nobody he answered, "who is that? who's there?"
"it's god enoch"
"who?"
"god. haven't you heard of me?"
"breaking news.....NO. go away"
after a moment of silence enoch went back to work until again he heard,
"enoch........enoch"
"who is it this time?"
"it's god again"
"look, i don't know who you are and i don't want to know. now go away!"
there were a couple of moments of silence but then again enoch heard,
"enoch........enoch"
"for fuck's sake i'm trying to get some work done here. who's there?"
"orange"
"orange who?"
"orange you glad i didn't say god?"
thus the birth of enoch enoch jokes.
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